Post by Tokrochiru on Apr 8, 2011 4:16:19 GMT -5
This is a transcript from an interview conducted by Walther Greyslain, regarding the characters who didn't quite make it into Worlds Collide.
Walther: Alrighty, let's see if everyone is here. Date?
Date Masamune: I'm heah!
Walther: Mitsurugi?
Mitsurugi: Hmph.
Walther: Kazuya?
Kazuya Mishima: This had better be worth it.
Walther: Garrus Vakarian?
Garrus: Is this really necessary? I mean, just look around the room. We're all here.
Sol Badguy: Yeah. Just get on with it.
Walther: Alright. Since it seems that everyone is here, I just wanna ask you all one, simple question. Why didn't you make it into World's Collide? Date, why don't you start?
Date: Heh. The one-eyed dragon isn't just for show, you see?....
Walther: .....No, I don't.
Date: PUT YA GUNS AON!!!
Walther: Okay, I think that's all we're going to get out of you. Mitsurugi, why aren't you in the cast?
Mitsurugi: Those idiots you call writers claimed there was only room for so many "badass swordsmen." in the cast. Vastion is a fool, Xerxes is an idiot, and Shishio isn't worthy to bear the same name as my sword. As for Hakumen, he needs to learn how to shut up and fight with his sword, rather than his mouth.
Walther: So you were rejected because there were too many swordsmen in the cast?
Mitsurugi: Yes. Now stop asking me questions.
Walther: Alright then, next up is Kazuya. Why didn't you join the cast?
Kazuya: Rugal Bernstein. He stole my rightful role as the token evil teammate. No worries, however. He will pay ten times over for it. I've already killed the CEO of SNK. It's only a short while until the King of Fighters franchise bites the dust.
Walther: To clarify, you're saying that you were rejected because Rugal had already filled a similar role?
Kazuya: That's the short version. Hurry this up, Walther. I have to leave in half an hour. There are ice cream stands that I wish to push over in an act of evil demonic RAGE!
Walther: Alright. Next up, Garrus. Why weren't you put in the cast?
Garrus: Well, the simple answer is that the RP would have been over within ten posts. If I were helping out the other main characters, I would have saved the multiverse by now.
Walther: Really?
Garrus: No, not really. Now, can we move this along? I've got some calibrations I need to finish on the Normandy.
Walther: That's what you told me when I first tried to contact you.
Garrus: Of course. I'm calibrating all day, every day. It's my thing.
Walther: Okay, putting Garrus' OCD aside, let's move on. Sol, you're up last. Why aren't you part of the cast?
Sol: I don't care enough to be in. I've got enough sh** on my plate. I don't need the weight of the multiverse on my shoulders.
Walther: I thought you didn't join the cast because there were already two Blazblue characters in it. Well, that and the PC slots were getting pretty full by the time Greed decided to allow fighting game characters...
Sol: You were wrong.
Date Masamune: GO STAIGHT!!!
Walther: Date, control yourself. Well....I think that concludes this little mini-interview. You guys can-
: Don't listen to them Garrus! It's all a trick!!
Garrus: Shepard? What the hell are you talking about? How did you get here?
Commander Shepard: This is all an elaborate trap set by the REAPERS!
Walther: Is this seriously happeni-
Commander: That man! The one conducting the interview! He's a REAPER in DISGUISE!!!
Garrus: Reapers are the size of starships commander. How could he possibly be a Reaper?
Walther: Look, I don't know what sort of insane logic you're going off of here, but you're giving me no choice here. I'm assuming direct control of-
Garrus: KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!
(guns shots)
Shepard: Told you it was a trap.
Garrus: Yeah, I guess you were right. I should've believed you from the start.
(Garrus looks down at the bodies lying around the room, each one of them dead from a headshot to the brain.)
Shepard: So, did you really fight KOS-MOS?
Garrus: Yeah, it was a tough fight. I had reach, but she had flexibility, so it all
Shepard: (snorting chuckle) Reach and flexibility....
Garrus: ....You're sick Shepard. It wasn't anything like that.
Shepard: ....Oh.....I'm uh....Sorry Garrus.
Garrus: It's alright. 'Cause we're SPACE BROS!!!
Shepard: SPACE BROS!!!!!
SPACE BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOS!!!!!!!!
(It occured to me that I didn't do anything for April Fools, so I decided to just do something while my mind was on crack. Also, I was bored. Hurtadurdalur everybody.)
Walther: Alrighty, let's see if everyone is here. Date?
Date Masamune: I'm heah!
Walther: Mitsurugi?
Mitsurugi: Hmph.
Walther: Kazuya?
Kazuya Mishima: This had better be worth it.
Walther: Garrus Vakarian?
Garrus: Is this really necessary? I mean, just look around the room. We're all here.
Sol Badguy: Yeah. Just get on with it.
Walther: Alright. Since it seems that everyone is here, I just wanna ask you all one, simple question. Why didn't you make it into World's Collide? Date, why don't you start?
Date: Heh. The one-eyed dragon isn't just for show, you see?....
Walther: .....No, I don't.
Date: PUT YA GUNS AON!!!
Walther: Okay, I think that's all we're going to get out of you. Mitsurugi, why aren't you in the cast?
Mitsurugi: Those idiots you call writers claimed there was only room for so many "badass swordsmen." in the cast. Vastion is a fool, Xerxes is an idiot, and Shishio isn't worthy to bear the same name as my sword. As for Hakumen, he needs to learn how to shut up and fight with his sword, rather than his mouth.
Walther: So you were rejected because there were too many swordsmen in the cast?
Mitsurugi: Yes. Now stop asking me questions.
Walther: Alright then, next up is Kazuya. Why didn't you join the cast?
Kazuya: Rugal Bernstein. He stole my rightful role as the token evil teammate. No worries, however. He will pay ten times over for it. I've already killed the CEO of SNK. It's only a short while until the King of Fighters franchise bites the dust.
Walther: To clarify, you're saying that you were rejected because Rugal had already filled a similar role?
Kazuya: That's the short version. Hurry this up, Walther. I have to leave in half an hour. There are ice cream stands that I wish to push over in an act of evil demonic RAGE!
Walther: Alright. Next up, Garrus. Why weren't you put in the cast?
Garrus: Well, the simple answer is that the RP would have been over within ten posts. If I were helping out the other main characters, I would have saved the multiverse by now.
Walther: Really?
Garrus: No, not really. Now, can we move this along? I've got some calibrations I need to finish on the Normandy.
Walther: That's what you told me when I first tried to contact you.
Garrus: Of course. I'm calibrating all day, every day. It's my thing.
Walther: Okay, putting Garrus' OCD aside, let's move on. Sol, you're up last. Why aren't you part of the cast?
Sol: I don't care enough to be in. I've got enough sh** on my plate. I don't need the weight of the multiverse on my shoulders.
Walther: I thought you didn't join the cast because there were already two Blazblue characters in it. Well, that and the PC slots were getting pretty full by the time Greed decided to allow fighting game characters...
Sol: You were wrong.
Date Masamune: GO STAIGHT!!!
Walther: Date, control yourself. Well....I think that concludes this little mini-interview. You guys can-
: Don't listen to them Garrus! It's all a trick!!
Garrus: Shepard? What the hell are you talking about? How did you get here?
Commander Shepard: This is all an elaborate trap set by the REAPERS!
Walther: Is this seriously happeni-
Commander: That man! The one conducting the interview! He's a REAPER in DISGUISE!!!
Garrus: Reapers are the size of starships commander. How could he possibly be a Reaper?
Walther: Look, I don't know what sort of insane logic you're going off of here, but you're giving me no choice here. I'm assuming direct control of-
Garrus: KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!
(guns shots)
Shepard: Told you it was a trap.
Garrus: Yeah, I guess you were right. I should've believed you from the start.
(Garrus looks down at the bodies lying around the room, each one of them dead from a headshot to the brain.)
Shepard: So, did you really fight KOS-MOS?
Garrus: Yeah, it was a tough fight. I had reach, but she had flexibility, so it all
Shepard: (snorting chuckle) Reach and flexibility....
Garrus: ....You're sick Shepard. It wasn't anything like that.
Shepard: ....Oh.....I'm uh....Sorry Garrus.
Garrus: It's alright. 'Cause we're SPACE BROS!!!
Shepard: SPACE BROS!!!!!
SPACE BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOS!!!!!!!!
(It occured to me that I didn't do anything for April Fools, so I decided to just do something while my mind was on crack. Also, I was bored. Hurtadurdalur everybody.)